Thursday, November 03, 2005

Soul bearing time.

It's probably the Interpol song I'm listening to right now that has any influence in my attitude right now. In browsing through my favorite blogs, I've come across a common theme - life wasting. Most of us went to college, are holding jobs and now have many adult responsibilities. But we still enjoy the little things, right? Girl's night, or getting together to watch our favorite television show, or just getting together at someone's house, indulging in tasty drinks and tastier conversation. I do have my moments where I wonder if I'm missing out on something, what about the future, am I capable of more, why shouldn't Ron and I just pack up and move somewhere 'hip' and 'progressive?' I loose track of myself sometimes.

I want to get back to where I was. I could find the silver lining in anything, smile every day and enjoy what life was going to throw at me. I want to find that person again. Now, stop right there. I really like living in the D-troit suburbs. I love my friends. I have the best friends in the world. I love my job (KNOCK ON WOOD KNOCK ON WOOD THROW SALT OVER MY LEFT SHOULDER POO POO POO). I love my Smerigan (all together now...aaaaawwwww). My family is awesome, when they're not crazy (but who's family isn't?) So why do I spend some days bitter and anxious and snarky? This might be coming from spending an entire week alone in the office, then coming home at night to animals who aren't great at holding up their end of a conversation. As I'm writing this, the Killers "Smile Like You Mean It" is playing. Funny.

Good advice, Brandon. I'm doing my best in keeping my mind sharp and to have an active interest in something, whether it's music or crafts or podcasts. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go find my spark. Sometimes it just takes a few posts to give me a swift kick in the ass.

On a lighter note, Cynthia and Jax and I started a goth band a few years ago called Black Patten Leather Cofin Purse. Our first album was called "Lament." I think we're getting back together. Coming soon to a City Club near you.

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